[Rockhounds] Geologist-style Legal Disclaimer for Geology Field Trip (and open access guidebook PDFs)

[Alan Silverstein]

> I was looking through a Friends of the Pleistocene (FOP) fieldtrip
> guidebook when I came across a "legal disclaimer" as only a geologist
> could have written...

Love it!  Even if it's a little longish.  :-)

Reminds me of this (below) old bit of humor I snagged...  34 years ago,
in 1986!

Cheers,
Alan Silverstein

------------

STANDARD DISCLAIMER

From:  elric at csustan.UUCP (Elric of Imrryr)
Date:  25 Nov 86
Newsgroups:  talk.bizarre

This product is meant for educational purposes only.  Any resemblance to
real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.  Void where
prohibited.  Some assembly required.  List each check separately by bank
number.  Batteries not included.  Contents may settle during shipment.
Use only as directed.  No other warranty expressed or implied.  Do not
use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.  Postage will be
paid by addressee.  Subject to CAB approval.  This is not an offer to
sell securities.  Apply only to affected area.  May be too intense for
some viewers.  Do not stamp.  Use other side for additional listings.
For recreational use only.  Do not disturb.  All models over 18 years of
age.  If condition persists, consult your physician.  No
user-serviceable parts inside.  Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Subject to change without notice.  Times approximate.  Simulated
picture.  No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.  Breaking
seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.  For off-road use only.  As
seen on TV.  One size fits all.  Many suitcases look alike.  Contains a
substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.  Colors may, in time,
fade.  We have sent the forms which seem to be right for you.  Slippery
when wet.  For office use only.  Not affiliated with the American Red
Cross.  Drop in any mailbox.  Edited for television.  Keep cool; process
promptly.  Post office will not deliver without postage.  List was
current at time of printing.  Return to sender, no forwarding order on
file, unable to forward.  Not responsible for direct, indirect,
incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or
failure to perform.  At participating locations only.  Not the Beatles.
Penalty for private use.  See label for sequence.  Substantial penalty
for early withdrawal.  Do not write below this line.  Falling rock.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.  Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Add toner.  Place stamp here.  Avoid contact with skin.  Sanitized for
your protection.  Be sure each item is properly endorsed.  Sign here
without admitting guilt.  Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
Employees and their families are not eligible.  Beware of dog.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
Limited time offer, call now to insure prompt delivery.  You must be
present to win.  No passes accepted for this engagement.  No purchase
necessary.  Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Shading within a garment may occur.  Use only in well-ventilated area.
Keep away from fire or flame.  Replace with same type.  Approved for
veterans.  Booths for two or more.  Check here if tax deductible.  Some
equipment shown is optional.  Price does not include taxes.  No Canadian
coins.  Not recommended for children.  Prerecorded for this time zone.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.  No solicitors.  No alcohol, dogs, or
horses.  No anchovies unless otherwise specified.  Restaurant package,
not for resale.  List at least two alternate dates.  First pull up, then
pull down.  Call toll free before digging.  Driver does not carry cash.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for
identification purposes only.  Record additional transactions on back of
previous stub.

This supersedes all previous notices.